Relationship Advice - Have a Partner, not Competitor

Being in a relationship not easy, everyone knows that. What puts a huge strain on a relationship is when your partner begins to feel like you are no longer supporting him, but are suddenly in competition with him. Reading the subtle signs that this is becoming a problem can help you nip this problem before it is too late.

Ambitious, competitive people are likely to find themselves in relationships with each other, where this problem is likely to arise. If this description applies to you, you should really take the time to consider whether or not your relationship is suffering from this problem. “Boy energy,” is something Rori Raye talks about - it is the type of energy that women use to reach great heights. She suggests that we women avoid bringing it to our relationships with men, because it can undermine our efforts to make him feel loved, respected, and accepted.

It should be easy to tell if this is a problem for you. He may suddenly shy away from competitive activities, like board games or exercise. If he declines your invitations to participate in competitive activities consistently, you can be sure that there is trouble in paradise.

There are a lot of ways you can throw off the balance in your relationship. Whether making jokes at his expense, or giving him a hard time when he can’t keep up with you on a jog, these little jabs will make him feel as though you are not supportive of him, and that you lack respect for him.

The reason why this is so destructive to an otherwise healthy relationship is that the role you play in his life should be one of love, respect, and acceptance. When he feels that these things are threatened, he begins to doubt the stability of your relationship, and his confidence is challenged. These seeds of doubt can make a relationship unravel.

You should begin to focus on solutions as soon as you recognize this as a problem. Instead of asking what his problem is, you need to ask what your problem is. The need to take away the glory from your partner and claim it as your own is actually an indication of insecurity. Only when you have reconciled this issue with yourself will you be willing and able to give freely the praise and respect that he needs from you.

If you take this relationship advice to heart as soon as you realize that there is a rift in your relationship, you stand a chance of resolving these issues. By putting yourself in his shoes, you can better understand the problem. Competition is a natural part of life, but it should not be a part of your love life! By saving your competitive energy for when it counts, and offering him the love, acceptance, and respect he deserves, you can turn your competitive relationship into one of mutual support.